Resolving Conflict

So many of the couples that I see every week in my practice have a great deal of difficulty talking about differences and resolving conflict.

Some of the time, it is because it is hard to figure out how to talk about differences. Other times, it is because their partner is unwilling or unable to hang in with the conversation until they reach a place of resolving conflict.

Just this week, I have met with 3 couples where husbands have had an affair. In all three of those cases, the husbands were unhappy in their marriage and had serious concerns but chose to talk with a woman other their wife about their unhappiness. What a bad decision!

Each man blamed his wife for the problems in opening up and resolving conflict. Not one of them recognized his part in the decision to avoid conflict and turn, instead, to another woman.

Failure to resolve conflict leads to distance, disappointment and unhappiness in relationships. Men and women have to find ways to do their part in resolving conflict.

We have written several articles about resolving conflict on our website, CounselingRelationshipsOnline.com. Click here to read more about how you can become a better half of a partnership in resolving conflict.

A Healthy Relationship Is More Important Than Winning An Argument: Discover 6 Ways To Repair Damage During Conflict

Is it more important for you to protect your relationship than it is to win a fight?

Can you disagree without being disagreeable?

Are you able to keep the love showing while conflict is flowing?

If your answer is “yes” to all of these questions, then you may not need to read any further. If any of these presents a strain for you; however, there may be some useful tips here for you.

All couples disagree. According to researcher, Dr. John Gottman, it is usually about the same things over and over again. In fact, his research points out that about 2/3rds of all disagreements are usually about the same issues.

Some couples are masters at working through conflict and keeping a good relationship as their primary focus. They truly disagree without being disagreeable.

Couples who can find ways to repair any damage to the relationship while they are having a disagreement, or, as some might call it, a fight, have more than half of the battle won. It makes so much more sense to compromise with or acquiesce to someone that you like and with whom you have a good relationship.

For others, repairing damage during conlict requires learning new habits and skills.

In future posts, we will discuss 6 different ways for you to repair damage to your relationship while you are having an argument.