KEEP CALM and CARRY ON ... ENJOY THE HOLIDAYS

KEEP CALM
and
CARRY ON

ENJOY THE HOLIDAYS



Here are 5 tips to help you KEEP CALM and CARRY ON so that you can ENJOY THE HOLIDAYS.

It’s all in the attitude
The more that you think your way to remaining calm, the more likely it is that will happen. Much of stress is in the way that you think about it. Remember that there is a reason for the season. Keep that reason in the forefront of your mind. Enjoy your family, friends and rituals.

Planning makes a huge difference
Because this is such a stress filled time of year, it is not a time to “fly by the seat of your pants”. Rather, have a plan. Make lists. Decide what is manageable for each day and try to keep within that plan. You do not have to do it all. Life will go on if everything is not decorated perfectly or the “right” gift is not under the tree. Your enjoyment of life is far more important to you and your loved ones than a purchase or another light in the yard.

Delegation
Reduce holiday stress by remembering that everything does not have to be on your list. Ask for help. Give others duties. Have pot lucks rather than fixing all of the food yourself. Work with your neighbors to help each other out. Working together can be a whole more fun and far less stressful than handling it all alone.

Deep breath
Do you know some deep breathing or meditation techniques? If not, this might be the time to learn them. You can use a simple app on your phone, practice 3 slow deep breaths in and out 3 times a day and whenever you are in stress or give yourself an early gift and take a class in meditation. More and more research is showing the benefits of meditation and mindfulness for physical and mental health.

Eat, sleep, pray, love
Take care of yourself in all ways.

Managing Family Holiday Stress

Being with family over the holidays can be very stressful. Here are some strategies for taking charge and directly managing the stress that this time of the year can bring.

Be positive and complimentary whenever you can. Don’t make things up, be realistic; however, remember that positivity breeds positivity and it may lead to a friendlier atmosphere for the family.

Avoid divisive subjects. Find ways to change the discussion or even leave the room. This is not a time to solve the world problems or dissect the latest election.

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Low-Cost Holiday Gifts

It is a week until Christmas. We know that many people are worried about how to provide gifts for their family and friends and yet want to give them something. We are going to offer one idea each day until Christmas.

Today's idea: a Family Staycation. Pretend that you are on vacation in your own home. Do things that you would normally do on vacation, stay up late and sleep in, eat different foods, play games, visit interesting sites, watch movies and eat popcorn. Celebrate time together.

Family Holiday Stress

The holidays are nearly here and many of us will be spending time with family. For many people this involves seeing relatives that they may only see at this time of the year. We do not always like or agree with all of our relatives and this can bring about stress and tension for days, weeks or even longer before the events. Here are some suggestions for how to think about and handle these gatherings.

Visualize the experience. Think about all of the possible difficult conversations or statements and make plans in your head or with your spouse about how to handle them. Practice your responses which can be anything from silence to a simple statement or a prolonged conversation. Planning for difficulties makes them less stressful.

Be positive and complimentary whenever you can. Don’t make things up, be realistic; however, remember that positivity breeds positivity and it may lead to a friendlier atmosphere for the family.

Avoid divisive subjects. Find ways to change the discussion or even leave the room. This is not a time to solve the world problems or dissect the latest election.

Answer the question: Is it more important to have family harmony or win an argument? Arguing rarely is helpful and yet it is important to stand up for yourself and sometimes for others. Prolonging a discussion after making a statement may not be helpful in the long-run. If you really need to state your opinion, do so respectfully, listen and then, if at all possible, find ways to let go.

Stand up for your spouse or children with your own family. If another family member makes a disparaging remark, calmly but directly, let them know that it is not okay with you to talk or treat your family in that way. If at all possible, try not to get into a prolonged confrontation where apologies are demanded, often that leads to more conflict. If you need to, find a way to leave the gathering early.

Try to position yourself around the relatives that you like and enjoy. Don’t make it too hard on yourself. If you find Uncle Charlie irritating, be friendly, but then sit near others. Remember, you don’t have to like everyone.

If alcohol is served, limit how much you drink. Plan to keep your good thinking in place.

Remember, this is only for a short period of time. You do not have to remain forever. It will be over and you can go back to your safe, comfortable surroundings with those who love and respect you and share your ideas and values.

Do you have any ideas to share with us? Please post your comments here.

Sally Connolly and John Turner
CouplesClinicofLouisville.com